Nightmare Before Halloween, 2011

I can't take credit for that clever entry title.  It was the heading for the Star Ledger's front page article on Sunday, 10/30.

So-- we have been without heat or power since late afternoon on Saturday. I'm trying to look at things humourously- what else can I do? I read part of Bram Stoker's Dracula by candlelight on Saturday night-- how truly apropos. I've been eating a steady amount of Greek yogurt mixed in with semi-frozen strawberries. Freshly purchased meat was placed in a cooler outside, with ice cubes and piles of snow. Foolishly, I did not think about the possibility of a bear scavenging for food and finding the cooler. The cooler was moved to the garage before said bear could get to it. My phone fell into a snowbank and once the snow melts, some possible lucky person will have access to pictures of a shirtless, "cut" John.

The entire humor of this situation rests upon the theory that there is a Halloween "curse" associated with John. During the course of our relationship, he has only purchased costumes on two occasions. The one year which he purchased a plus size Geisha girl costume and was planning on going "gung ho" with the whole costume idea was the same Halloween that my grandmother passed away. Fast forward to years later and the instance in which John buys the barely covered Greek warrior costume is the same time at which a freakish autumnal snow storm occurs. Clearly, the man should never buy a costume again.

So.... it's now Monday and we still have no power. Whenever I breathe inside the house, I can see the small circles that my breath forms. Also, today I am going to test out Costco's amazing return policy by returning the meats that we bought Saturday (still, somehow, basically frozen). I want to see if I can get my 50 bucks back.

Someone I know from Rockaway Township Fire Dept. says power will not be up in Rockaway until Friday! John's parents finally got power back. So....worst case scenario is...staying at in-laws and having access to laundry facilities, utter warmth, and kickass food:) I'll take it.

Simpleton

It's so aggravating that the realization that I have no desire to own a house has arrived after we have moved into a house...

There's an end in sight...If we put the house on the market after July of 2012, we do not have to pay back the 8,000 dollar tax credit we got. July...somewhat of an end is in sight.

This morning, while putting dishes away in the kitchen, I recalled that I do actually own "china" and "nice" cutlery; it's all in boxes at the in-laws' house. I have no desire to actually display those pieces in my "china cabinet." The china cabinet currently houses a few wine glasses and...that's about it.

I think when I got married some people thought I would transform into domesticated Michelle--- hosting cookie swaps, serving meals on china, and so forth. I don't think everyone had that viewpoint but surely some people thought to themselves, "Yeah, she'll grow up a bit."

I don't think there is anything wrong with not having the desire to cook or bake...nothing wrong with not really caring about window "treatments"...nothing wrong with not wanting to have the house decorated based on seasonal or holiday themes.

I think back to October of 2008... I was certainly still "me," but I definitely altered part of myself, amidst the wedding planning hoopla. Back then, I had the bright blonde highlights and ultra tan skin. I looked like a Californian caricature of myself.

I'm glad to be back to me.

Ruminations on Belly Dancing

Tonight was class #2 of belly dancing. As usual, with any class that requires rhythm or coordination, I proved to be mediocre. I honestly want to ask my mother if I had issues with "my right" and "my left" when I was a child---as an adult, I have no kinesthetic intelligence. When everyone turns to the right, I am turning to the left. When people have their left arms flailing in the air, my right arms are flailing. I had to have experienced some developmental delay as a child---HAD to...

At one point in the class, four of us had to perform the "routine" at the same, while the remaining members of the class watched. There a slight applause after our group went; honestly, I think they were clapping because they realized that someone in the class could now officially be crowned "the worst," thus making themselves feel better. It's okay to be poor at something, so long as you are not the worst.

Me, I revel in being mediocre when it comes to physical tasks. I just laugh at myself and have fun with it. While  I struggled with shoulder shimmies, the instructor asked, "Haven't you ever been coy or flirty with someone? That's what shoulder shimmies are like." I turned toward Jess and whispered, "Thank god I met John on the Internet...sexy dances move would have gotten me nowhere with men."

At this point, I am so happy that I am at a point in my life where I can laugh at my lack of rhythm and coordination. I think back to high school gym class, any element of it, and moments were completely miserable. I could not catch a ball, run at a decent pace, or even keep up with the movements in step aerobics. Belly dancing is crazy challenging, but I am just having fun with it. I haven't said "fuck" once during the class, so that's an additional positive sign.

Besides, I already have a solution for my bad dance moves:I am going to get breast implants and buy a kickass corset. That way when I belly dance, I will give the illusion of amazing dance skills with my jutting curves:)